The Net Zero Effect

Have you ever asked somebody, maybe a friend, to help you move? Do you agree that moving from one home to another is a pain in the ass? So if your friend agrees to help you move, he/she is taking time out from his/her schedule to help you move. You gain that person's time and energy in helping you move but they lose their personal time that they could have done something else with. So you gain their time (+ time) in helping you but they lose their own personal time (- time). This is what I call the "net zero effect".

What if someone asks you to take them to the airport because they wanted to save some money by not calling a shuttle service, and you have to take time off your regular work day to take them to the airport? Again someone gains time or money and you lose time or money. This is what I call the "net zero effect".

The Chinese Zodiac

Under the Chinese zodiac, there are 12 rotating animal signs. There is the rat, ox, tiger, dragon, snake, horse, goat, monkey, rooster, rabbit, dog or pig. In addition there are five rotating elements - gold, water, wood, fire and earth - of which gold is the most coveted. So there is a 12 year cycle between when the animals repeat and a 60 year cycle when both the animal/element will repeat.

2007 is the year of the golden pig, arguably the most coveted of all the animals/signs. Supposedly China is bracing themselves for an increase in the birth rate this year because people want to have their children in the year of the golden pig. The golden pig is supposedly very lucky.

So do I believe in this shit? About as much as I believe in Santa Claus dropping down my damn chimney, eating milk and cookies, and then dropping presents under the Christmas tree. But hey, you're entitled to your own beliefs and if you want to believe in the golden pig, then be my guest.

Blonde Joke

BLONDE: "Excuse me, what time is it right now?"

WOMAN: "It's 11:25PM."

BLONDE: (confused look on face) "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I've asked that question thirty times today, and every time someone gives me a different answer."

Ode to a Cubicle

Spend my days in a cubicle
my mind is frozen like an icicle
Sitting in my chair, eyes staring at the screen
I do my thing, don't wanna be seen
What time is it? I have a hunch
It's probably time to go to lunch
Come back from lunch, back to my chair
I think to myself life is quite fair
It's 6 o'clock, 'bout time to go home
Go home to my family for I am not alone.

Great Hole in the Wall Places to Eat

Sliders Burgers in San Jose on San Carlos Street makes really damn good hamburgers. I mean they grill these 8 oz. (yeah boy, that's half a pound) hamburgers over a rotating flame grill. This shit is the bomb. The ground beef patties are made fresh in the back of the restaurant. After they grill your hamburger, you get to put your own toppings and condiments on this burger. This place has got to be one of my favorite places for a hamburger. Also, the price of an 8 oz. hamburger meal with fries and a drink is something like $6.50. Yes, it's good and cheap.

Sliders Burgers
1645 W. San Carlos Street
San Jose, CA 95128
408-298-4340

Many many years ago, this chick (we'll keep her identity anonymous in order to protect the innocent) turned me onto Mario's Peruvian & Seafood on Melrose Ave. This hole in the wall place in Los Angeles makes this really phat dish called "Lomo Saltado". Every time I go to LA, I always stop by this restaurant and eat the phat lomo saltado (about $9.50 for the dish) and have a can of Inca Cola. If you don't know what kind of food I'm talking about here, then you're missing out. And if you're missing out, well I can't help you there.

Mario's Peruvian & Seafood Restaurant
5786 Melrose Ave (Cross Street: Rossmore Avenue)
Los Angeles, CA 90038-3844
(323) 466-4181

Thai food is pretty much standard fare. I mean to say that one Thai restaurant can't be that much better or worse than the next Thai restaurant because their menus are all standardized and they all serve pretty much the same dishes. But I think that Westwood Thai Cafe makes pretty good Thai food and the prices are quite cheap here. This is a little hole in the wall restaurant on Westwood Blvd. across from the Borders bookstore. If you're in the Westwood area, you should definitely stop by this place for some good and cheap Thai food.

Westwood Thai Cafe
1375 Westwood Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90024
310-477-7031

Nothing else left to do

So people ask me why I got married. My usual reply is "Might as well get married, ain't nothing else left to do." That's partly true. I mean if you're dating a significant other for some long amount of time, you either need to get married or split up. Right? I don't know but it pretty much amounts to "either shit or get off the pot."

So after I got married, I bought a condominium. It's the natural progression right? You buy a condo together with your spouse because you have 2 incomes coming in and it's probably a smarter thing to do than dump your money into the black hole we call rent.

Many years after I bought a condo, I had a baby. Nothing else left to do, might as well have a kid, right? Having a baby is one of the most miraculous miracles of life. I mean this is something that you and your spouse create and this baby of yours is and always will be a constant thing in your life no matter what.

After you have a kid, you might as well buy that single family home with a backyard and a white picket fence. You see, you have a kid now and you want your kid(s) to be able to grow up with a little back yard and run around your lawn. So you might as well buy a house because there's nothing else left to do. Now that I have just purchased my house, I really don't have anything left to do. Maybe I have to wait until I'm 40 years old and have a mid-life crisis and then I'll buy a convertible or something because there's nothing else left to do.